So where's all the ladies!!

Alright I'm sorry I got a bit thingy. ( Grovel Grovel ) But what do yer expect, this was one of the last male bastions left. But as the saying goes...move with the times...a kitchen without a woman is a kitchen without a dish washer! (just kidding) You have to remember I'm new to all this, so I'm bound to make mistakes as we go along. Now down to the florists and see what they're got in red roses.

Black Roses for these women. Damn its a well known fact they sulk when men show an inkling of superiority , sulk when they dont get a compliment. I tried to compliment a women once an got a slap in the face for it. Geez, an all i said was YOUR'VE got a big one, wham slap in the face an thrown off. Did i mention its a well known fact women have no sense of humour either .

Yeah I had a nasty incident on the golf course one saturday. there were four of us playing down the fifth fairway and Lily Smith played her shot and put it over the fence out of bounds. So we all moved down ,jumped the fence and went looking for her ball. We were just about to give it away and I noticed this golf ball sitting as neat as you like under the base of a near by cows tail. I quietly approached the animal and lifted its tail saying ...This looks like yours Mrs Smith. She bloody took to me with a five iron.

It is a well known fact GOLFERS are LIARS.

I resemble that.

I managed to run the gauntlet of the police state and do my grocery shopping.
When I was in the supermarket a middle aged woman in a wheelchair said to me for apparently no reason"you're handsome" . Which I had to agree with naturally but it seemed a peculiar thing to say to a stranger waiting in line at the checkout.
It was so peculiar I was struck dumb. Particularly as several people turned suddenly and hopefully in my direction only to see a middle aged bald guy with a finger halfway up his nostril. And a confused look on my face, no doubt.

Have I come to a point in life where I have to woo handicapped women? Or be wooed by them?
I have tried to get a woman legless before, but this might be going too far.
Will a woman who has no feeling below the waist make any difference to how I'm received in the romance department?

On reflection I think she was Greek. My first impression was maybe Italian but no probably Greek.
In my youth I had a bad experience with a Greek girl. She seemed very shy and demure until we got back to the privacy of my house. And as soon as she took off her clothes she was like a rabid dog.
Scared the bejesus out of me.
I can still see her pointing at her bush. For god knows what reason. It was the hairiest bush I'd ever seen. I thought maybe I was supposed to watch for a pith helmet to pop out and say 'livingston I presume'
I dont know if it did, I faked a hammy and hid in the bathroom til she left.
Maybe it was the same woman.
Wouldnt surprise me that she ended up in a wheelchair

Apocalypse prettysoon wrote:I managed to run the gauntlet of the police state and do my grocery shopping.
When I was in the supermarket a middle aged woman in a wheelchair said to me for apparently no reason"you're handsome" . Which I had to agree with naturally but it seemed a peculiar thing to say to a stranger waiting in line at the checkout.
It was so peculiar I was struck dumb. Particularly as several people turned suddenly and hopefully in my direction only to see a middle aged bald guy with a finger halfway up his nostril. And a confused look on my face, no doubt.

Have I come to a point in life where I have to woo handicapped women? Or be wooed by them?
I have tried to get a woman legless before, but this might be going too far.
Will a woman who has no feeling below the waist make any difference to how I'm received in the romance department?

At least you can then tell her how good you were. She would hardly be in a position to dispute it.

Your all Sicko's

Fuck you lot are good at chasing off the fairer sex. Paula is gone, Mistress has failed to reappear, Blythe is a very rare show and CPA has dissapeared.

Dirtbikepilot wrote:Fuck you lot are good at chasing off the fairer sex. Paula is gone, Mistress has failed to reappear, Blythe is a very rare show and CPA has dissapeared.

Excuse me but I had just finished humbling my self in the very attempt to make amends. Thank you very much. If you would prefer I can go back to my usual gruff self.

Hell, i am the only one who treated the women with respect,

Yeah balls! Your always running with the status quo!

And guess what that pisses me no end.

Get up off your belly and face it like a man. Who knows we might make a

soldier of you yet.

I thought you were a Sailor gayboy!

I didn't know you were an old sea dog Butch. Did you spend your days chasing the sea cat on the 02 deck?